20 wedding planning mistakes to avoid
1. Overspending without setting a Wedding Budget
How much you are planning to spend is one of the most critical aspects in wedding planning. It sets the foundation of the type of wedding you will have along with how it will look and feel. It’s important to establish a firm budget and to stay close to it. Research the average cost of similar type weddings in your area and find a comfortable number to work with. Will last minute, unexpected cost come up? Most likely but It’s still important to establish a realistic budget. Many times, excited couples start booking vendors and making purchases without having a budget in mind. Then shocked to realize they’ve already spent most of their money and don’t have all the things they need. Planning a wedding is a job, so it’s important to stay within your budget and keep track of all your expenses so you can actually relax on your wedding day.
2. Messing Up the Marriage License
There are lots of rules surrounding marriage licenses that you might not be familiar with. For instance, if you get your license 61 days before your wedding in Pennsylvania, you won't be able to legally marry on your wedding day because a license is valid in the state for only 60 days. You could still have the ceremony, though—guests wouldn't ever know you weren't legally married on that day. Obtain your license the day before your wedding, and it’s possible you may not get it in time (some states have a three-day waiting period). A common mishap for those marrying for a second time is forgetting your official divorce papers when you get the certificate.
3. Neglecting to make a rain plan
Obviously this is only relevant if you’re planning an outside affair, but you’d be surprised how many couples count on marital luck to ensure perfect weather. No matter how much you think coming up with a rain plan might jinx the forecast, do it. Ask your venue if there’s a backup plan or location in case of inclement weather.
4. Getting Attached to a Specific Flower Type
When you book your florist a year before your wedding day, they can only guess which blooms will be in your price range and available for your wedding. If your heart is set on orchids, you could be disappointed the day of. To prevent this, choose backups to your main blooms and add them to your contract. Try to think in terms of colors and shapes instead of specific flowers.
5. Sending Out Save-the-Dates Too Soon
It may be tempting to tell everyone about your wedding date as soon as possible, but don't send those save-the-date cards just yet. It’s pretty much an unofficial invitation. What if you decide to nix a bunch of third-tier guests months later or the venue can’t accommodate your large party? There’ll be hurt feelings. Wait until you’ve landed on a venue and finalized your number before blasting the news.
6. Letting Other People Pick Your Wedding Party
Your wedding party is yours, which means you’re the one narrowing it down to your closest friends and family members, regardless of gender, familial ties and many other factors. Picking people to please a family member can result in a sticky situation, so it’s best to choose what feels right for you. After all, it’s your wedding day.
7. Blowing Your Fashion Budget on Just the Dress
If you have $1,400 set aside for your bridal look, that doesn't necessarily mean you’ll be able to buy a gown with a $1,400 price tag. Tack on tax and, if you're not buying off the rack, shipping. You'll likely need alterations too. Don’t forget to factor in your undergarments, shoes, veil, hair accessories and jewelry when budgeting for your overall look.
8. Ordering Your Wedding Dress Too Late
While we’re on the topic of wedding dress. If you're purchasing a dress that needs to be customized or ordered, do so by the six-month mark latest. Since your dress will be custom made, buffer in ample time to receive the piece and complete fittings. In addition, most off-the-rack wedding dresses will require alterations, so make certain you have enough time for that entire process. The same goes for the bridesmaid dresses.
9. Skipping the Videographer
Photos are a must for most couples, but they only take you so far. It’s no big surprise that couples have some budget regrets, but what is surprising is what many say they regret not spending or spending more on is a videographer. Videos allow you to hear all the spoken words throughout the day. Imagine hearing your vows and all the speeches again. The reaction of the groom’s first look of the bride in her dress or your friends tearing up the dance floor. By hiring a professional videographer to document your wedding, you'll relive all the special moments and even those you may have missed on the day.
10. Nixing the hair and makeup trial
When you wake up on the morning of your wedding, you’ll feel better knowing that your hair and makeup are going to look exactly the way you want. So, a trial run is absolutely essential! While you may have friends or professionals who you’ve worked with in the past. You’ll want assurance and not leave it to chance (especially if you’re going for a new look). Bring photos of any inspiration you have and pictures of the wedding dress. To get the most out of your trial run, schedule it for the same day as your engagement photos, bridal shower, or just a date night with your fiancé. Try to schedule your trial run at least a couple of months before the wedding so if it doesn’t work out the way you hoped, you’ll have time to schedule another appointment.
11. Booking Hotel Rooms Too Late
This is an easy wedding planning mistake to make for newly engaged couples. To-be-weds will leave the task of securing hotel room blocks for out-of-town wedding guests until the last minute. If you're marrying during a busy time and you don't look into hotel availability in advance, you can end up with no rooms for your guests so reserve as early as possible. Begin your research up to a year in advance, and make sure your block is booked at least by the eight-month mark—if not sooner. Include hotel information in your save-the-date cards, wedding website and invitations.
12. Underpaying Invitation Postage
You'd be surprised how many to-be-weds underestimate the postage stamp process with some dropping an entire batch into a mailbox without paying the correct amount. Most wedding invitations require additional postage, and the post office will return them back to you. Weigh an invitation at the post office before purchasing your stamps and be aware of any price increases too. (Note: Square invitations require additional postage not only because of the weight but the shape too.) Don’t want to deal with the hassle? Use electronic invitations online or a hybrid of the two.
13. Inviting Too Many Guests
Your guest list shouldn’t exceed the maximum capacity of people at the reception site. You can't invite 400 people assuming only 250 will accept. If you end up with 300 acceptances, you may have to turn 50 guests away at the door. As much as vendors would like to accommodate you, most wedding venues are prohibited from adding 10 more tables, especially since fire laws limit the maximum number of people allowed in any room at one time. Analyze your guest list from the get-go, assume 85 percent will respond "yes" and limit that amount accordingly.
14. Micromanaging Your Vendors
You're booking talented pros who understand your vision, so it's important to let them do their jobs. I know it's tempting to control every detail, but after your initial meetings, it's best to step back and trust the pros to get it right. Definitely be clear with your vision and express any important specifics of what you want or don’t want. Then relax and let them handle it. You don’t need any added stress.
15. Not Asking Enough Questions
While it’s important to be polite to your vendors, it’s also important to make sure you get all the information you need. Don’t be afraid to ask specific questions so that you understand exactly what you’re signing up for. Ask your vendors to spell it out for you. “If your florist gives you a proposal that says ‘healthy white flowers in May,’ are they peonies? Are the carnations? Are they mums?” It may be uncomfortable to ask the pros so many questions, but it will help you and your partner make informed decisions throughout the process.
16. Hiring a Friend Instead of a Pro
Your friend from college may make amazing workout playlists, but that doesn't mean he'll make a great wedding DJ. The same goes for your friend who's an expert Instagrammer—this doesn't make her a photographer. Even on a tight budget, I always recommend hiring professional wedding vendors with experience. Plus it’s more fun if your friends can fully enjoy your wedding day with you anyway.
17. Doing it all by yourself
If you're a to-be-wed lucky enough to have been offered help by friends or family members, by all means, take it. Too many people try to do it all, which can get overwhelming. Delegate and use all the resources that are available to you. When people offer to assist, like your mom, future mother-in-law or best friend, find something for them to do, like researching a vendor or addressing invitations. But it's important to keep in mind that these volunteers don't work for you, so accept their contributions graciously. If you need more help, hire a professional wedding planner so someone can take on those difficult tasks throughout the whole process.
18. Letting yourself get too stressed
I know, I know. Your wedding is a pretty big deal. But being too tightly wound will drive you and everyone around you, a little crazy. Instead of micro-managing every single aspect of the day, prioritize the things that are most important to you (whether that’s the food or the music or even the seating chart) and loosen the reins on the other stuff a little bit.
19. Being Too Chill
On the flipside, being too relaxed throughout the planning process can actually backfire. I’ve known many a bride who prides herself on being the anti-bridezilla only to freak out the week before when she realizes she really did need to care about some stuff. As with all things in life, planning a successful wedding is all about balance.
20. Forgetting to Focus on What's Important
Keep in mind you're getting married and starting a life together. Be good to each other (and those helping you plan the celebration). Some tension, whether it’s between you as a couple or with loved ones, is inevitable due to the heavy decisions that accompany weddings. Remember why you decided to take this leap in the first place.
